TUNNELS

I am going to share with you all one of the best presents I have ever received in my life.

My father wrote this to us kids the Christmas after my mom passed away and it is one of the most profound things I've ever read. It's always helped me when I feel stuck in my life. Maybe it will do the same for you.

TUNNELS OF MY MIND

By Mike Vuittonet

I don't like tunnels. They are often dark and cold and because it's hard to see, I often fear what lies before me. I know I cannot avoid these tunnels, they are as much a part of our lives as is breathing. I am thankful that I have not spent endless days or years within these places. Many days of sunshine, love and hope have become my flashlight. As I wander through these times, I think of you my dear children. My heart and eyes swell with tears as I watch you trying to make your way through your own tunnels. Though we are surrounded by loved ones, we find ourselves alone in these places. As much as I would like to be there with you, I know that this is not possible. So I'll try to give you some thoughts from my heart to yours. Just take them with you as you enter these dark places. Store them in your heart, because it is your heart that will help you find the way to your hopes and dreams.

You will encounter many kids of tunnels, they will vary in size, depth, light, darkness and temperature. Some will be very scary, some deceptively pleasant, while others can become a tomb. You, and you alone will chose which ones to explore. You, and you alone will chose how long to stay and whether or not it is wise or safe to continue. Here are some of tunnels you have or will have to face.

SELF PITY

This one is often hard to recognize. Most of the time we don't even know were in it and when some one tells us so, we usually refuse to believe it. The consequences of dwelling in a tunnel like this are many. We become self centered, sorrowful and depressed. Let your heart stand up and say, " I refuse to say in this place. I will look to the needs of others. I will not allow sorrow and depression to steal my hopes and dreams.

ANGER

This one is obvious, for the terrain here is very jagged, cold and precarious. Should you choose to live hear, you must understand this. You will live hear alone (even though you are surrounded by people who love you in spite of it). For in this place there is little concern for others. Patients, compassion and kindness are rays of light which cannot be found here.

BITTERNESS

This place will pierce you heart with many sorrows. The problem is this, bitterness often finds it's way out of you r tunnel and breaks the hearts of those whom you love. Never believe you have the right to be bitter. When you feel yourself exploring this tunnel ask yourself, "why"? You will find that bitter people, often cast blame on others. It is never their fault for feeling the way they do. Don't blame others. Accept that which is hard to bear even if you feel that it is unbearable. Get out of this tunnel as quickly as possible. If not for your own sake, then for the sake of those you love.

SHAME

This tunnel is one which can steal your dreams. When we make mistakes it tends to rob us of our confidence and self-esteem. As we begin to lose these, we start to lose our hope and when you lose your hope, you cannot dream. Learn from your mistakes. Be the kind of person that says, "I will not do so again. I will overcome my shame, I will fulfill my dreams".

Not all tunnels are bad, some can lead you past your trials and heart aches, but you must be willing to explore them.

CHANGE

It can be frightening, it can be exciting. But one thing is certain, it will be. If it must be, then we must let our hearts be open to it. For if we refuse that which is inevitable, then inevitably we will find our way back into the tunnels described above. Be courageous and explore these tunnels. Fore this is certain, once we accept change, then and only then can we help direct it.

There is one more thing you must take with you as you explore these places both bad and good. You must take that flashlight I spoke of . Remember all of you r blessings. The joy you have known and the lessons you have learned. Always remember who gave you this flashlight. It was not I nor was it your mother. All the joy we have ever known together is because of God's blessings. This flashlight is the only one you will ever need. Learn to use it and let it be your guide. For there is no darkness to great that his light cannot shine through. Forget your flashlight and you tunnel can become a tomb. So hold onto it tight and your family will be there to hold and embrace you as you emerge from the dark tunnels of your heart to the joy of living once again.

I love you,

Dad