Dear Mom,
I don't even know how to begin to write this, but I feel like I need to get out these feelings and writing seems as good a way as any. Well, it's Mothers day again, the day I seem to miss you the most. I know you would tell me not to let that rob me of the joy of being a mother myself and miss out on how much my children try to make me happy on this day and your right, and I'm trying. We went to the cemetery and brought you flowers like we always do, and there they were running around, laughing. It's funny how your heart can ache so bad and yet be so happy at the same time. You would love them so much mom. Sometimes I try to imagine you holding them, singing to them, fixing up their owies. Those are the moments it hurts the most. My little Cassie just reminds me of you. Today we were over at Grandam's house for dinner and she sat in you high chair. I can't believe she's kept it all these years. Karlie and Camille have got your long legs and will probably look the most like you. And my little Noah would just melt your heart. Dont worry, Toby and I still love eachother with a love like you always prayed I would find, and ten years later it just keeps getting stronger.
I think you would be proud of all of us, how far we've come since you left us to be with the Lord. Rachel has a brand new baby boy and she is the best little mommy ever. Oh mom, you would be so proud of her, and she has a wonderful husband named Mike. He loves her so much, I'm so thankful for him. And Sarah, she's all grown up now. She turned into quite a woman. When she finally let go of all that anger, she began to be able to move forward, and it's a step at a time, but she's taking them. We are all praying for our Josh. I have faith, that one day he too can enjoy life again. I know he wants so badly to be the man you always knew he could be, and with God's help he'll get there.
I guess, more than anything, I just want to say, I love you, I miss you and I can't wait to see you again. My heart longs for that day. Thanks mom, thank you for molding me, loving me, teaching me about the Lord, right from wrong, and how to always, "Win em with love". I can still hear you say that. Thank the Lord for me, and tell him how much it meant that he shared you with us. That I got to have the most incredible teacher, best friend and mother for 21 years. I don't want to dwell on the day you died, because you were so much bigger than that moment. I want to think about how you lived, how you loved and gave love in return. I want to remember your smile, how when you laughed, it was always contagious. How my friends always told me I was the luckiest girl in the world. It took me a long time to fully understand that, but I think now I do.
Happy Mothers day mom, I love you so much and can't wait to see you again someday.
Love Me
5 comments:
I've backspaced a million times because I can't find the "just right" comment so I'm not even gonna try!
So heartfelt and words any mother would love to hear.
What a beautiful tribute to your Mother. Dave and I were both so touched when we read the loving words you wrote. We're so thankful she's won her race, but we know it's been hard sometimes to run yours without her. What a testimony to the power of our God your dear family is.
The girls look so much like your mom to me. Its the little faces they make from time to time that i see her in them. And Noah...she would melt over him! Cassie would be her little sassy princes =). Very sweet letter Tasha. I've found myself thinking some of the very same things you wrote about my dad. Truly look forward to the day we get to see them again.
Love you girly <3
Tasha I never got the pleasure of knowing your mom but can tell from knowing you and Rachel she was a wonderful person. Anynways what a great letter
I read this post when you first put in out and I was not able to comment. See i lost my Mom almost 3 years ago and this spoke straight to my heart. I really miss my Mom sometimes especially around Mothers Day. Thanks for sharing this with us.
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